How to Change your Paradigm For Kick-Ass Success
We all have dreams – dreams of a better or different life.
For some it’s the luxury home, others it’s the dream car, others the dreamy partner in life….maybe travel the world in style? It might even be just to see that six-pack you know is lurking underneath the holiday flab or to finally fit into those skinny jeans…
The list is endless…
If you are human and you still breathing you want something, always!
We are born to want more, do more, have more, or be more –that’s the point of life, isn’t it?
No doubt you have already tried setting a goal around what it is you want, or maybe even cried out at night making a deal with a deity that if you could just have …….you will…..
But alas, here you are still …..still searching for the answer.
Face it, you are mad at the unfairness of life and you are frustrated – tired of trying …
The little angel on your one shoulder tells you that you can have anything you want –“you deserve it just because you exist” or you have put in countless hours and sleepless nights so it’s just a matter of time till you achieve your result.
BUT the little devil on the other shoulder mocking laughs at you – “who do you think you are? Be grateful for what you have, some things are just not meant for you!! Don’t be a dreamer”….he says
In this post, I’ll explain what paradigms are and why they could be holding you back, how to challenge and change them so that you can operate at your full potential.
What is a Paradigm?
It all starts and ends with your brain – more specifically how you use your brain.
In order to understand what a paradigm is we have to take a step back and first understand what mindset is.
Although there is more than one definition the most appropriate one is to be found is sourced from Wikipedia:
“In decision theory and general systems theory, a mindset is a set of assumptions, methods, or notions held by one or more people or groups of people. A mindset can also be seen as arising out of a person’s world view or philosophy of life. “
This definition shows that our mindset is made up of not only what we thinking at any given time ( that’s why positive thinking is not the easy way out) but also refers to the programming of the mind – the way you view the world.
These automatic programs (or patterns of thoughts) running our minds are called our paradigms.
We all have patterns of thought around money, love, health, faith, education, government, philosophy of life, and so forth. A group of thoughts around money would then be called your “money or wealth paradigm.”
Paradigms shape our thinking ..imagine for a second a paradigm is like a muscle…if the muscle is weak you will not be able to bench press as much as if you have strong, developed muscles. Our abilities and choices as to what weights we would try out at the gym would therefore be limited.
Similarly, if we keep developing our muscles in our body so that we can be stronger and fitter to be able to lift and use bigger weights at the gym, we need to do the same with our paradigms if we want to reap the benefits of a successful life.
So are your existing paradigms helping you or hindering you?
Why do Paradigms matter?
If you have ever failed, given up, or never even tried to get a result in some area you working on it is because of the subconscious belief or paradigm you hold around that area.
But,” I recite positive mantras all day” you shriek, “I even have post-it notes on every surface in my house” you cry out in despair…..
Yes, that all helps but you need to dig deeper….you have to be able to shift your paradigm to the place where not only is what you want possible for you but is it really and truly what you believe to be possible for you…
It’s kind of fake it till you make type thinking, but at some point, you have to realize that faking it is not going to cut it – you need to develop the core belief.
How to Change Your Paradigm
But how do I believe something that seems impossible, you ask?
Well, the answer is you challenge your paradigms until the result you want becomes possible for you.
It’s like peeling back the onion layer after layer until you come to the root cause of why you don’t really believe something.
The great mystics and philosophers have been telling us for years – “if you can believe it you can achieve it “– this is not just an inspirational quote – this is science!!
I will not dive into the science here, but Quantum physics shows us that thoughts become things!
Perhaps you have come across the saying that there is no external reality – there is only your reality. Each person on this earth has his or her own set of thoughts/experiences and beliefs that “color” the way they view the world.
It is these thoughts and beliefs (paradigms) that shape us, guide us, and keep us safe from overwhelm.
However, it is these exact same thoughts and beliefs that either make our goals achievable or impossible.
Examples of paradigm challenging questions to ask:
[Tip: All blanks can be inserted with whatever you desire: money, love, health, relationships, career, faith, body image, etc]
· What do I believe to be true about ……?
· Why do I believe this is the ONLY truth about ………?
· Is there another way to think about …..?
· What if I am wrong about ……..?
· Am I really too old to do/change or have?
· Do I know EVERYTHING there is to know about ………?
· Why did ” a successful person” achieve ……….. and I can’t?
· Why do I feel greedy if I want more?
· Why do I believe I need ……….. first, in order to be/do or have ……….?
· Who taught me that. ………. means I can never be, do, or have …………?
· How can “money ” be evil? (In and of itself it’s neutral – your paradigm gives it meaning)
· Won’t it mean if I have more others will have less? (Where else does scarcity show up in your life?)
· Why not me? (If you have a whole list of reasons why not you then you need to challenge each different reason separately)
· If I’m being so positive already why haven’t I already achieved my desires?
· Why do I believe my problems/lack of opportunities are worse than other people’s?
· But surely my unfortunate childhood is what holds me back from my dreams?
Where do Paradigms come from?
Our beliefs and subsequent paradigms were mostly instilled in us by our environment and informative relationships before the age of 7.
Like a sponge, our young brains absorbed everything we felt, heard, and saw around us.
Most of us are not aware of our “unquestioning belief systems” or the role they play in our decision-making, goal setting, and future capabilities.
So far we have been taught to only believe what we can see. – The new science teaches us to rather see what we believe.
Once you become aware of the fact that it is something that you can change you will never look at life the same way again.
Becoming successful isn’t about luck or being at the right place at the right time despite being led to believe that the few lottery winners splashed on prime time news are somehow “special” or “lucky”.
And we all know what happens for most of them, right?
Successful people have cultivated a range of habits and disciplines that took work, focus, and dedication but ultimately what made the difference was their ability to decide what to believe about themselves, despite the incredible odds many faced.
For some, it happened relatively easily and quickly, but for others, it took more time to change their paradigms.
So matter where you are in life right now there is undeniable evidence that you can achieve your dreams if you challenge your paradigms.
What you believe is what wins the game.
Every. Single. Time.
What to do next
Most successful people will tell you the reason they broke through their barriers of mediocrity to success was that they had a mentor or a coach. Often we are too comfortable with our status quo that we are unable to see that the beliefs we are holding onto are what is holding us back from achieving real results.
If you are thinking that mentoring is not for you or not worth it perhaps it is time to challenge your paradigm around what it takes to learn from others who have already used their brains to achieve Kick-Ass success then click here.
What are your thoughts on how to change your paradigm? Leave a comment.
How to Change Your Paradigm For Kick-Ass Success